- A man buys a cup of slush (a frozen drink that is apparently as addictive as crack cocaine, judging by the reactions of most people) but puts the straw in upside down. The girl who served him notices this and tells him, 'Oh, no, sir, that's the wrong way up.' At this point, the man breaks from just regular moment-of-mindlessness into full-blown mental deficient with the IQ of a vaccuum cleaner. Instead of removing the straw and re-inserting it correctly (heh, inserting, I'm filthy), hep tips the entire CUP of slush upside down. As a consequence of that pesky thing called gravity, the slush ends up all over the floor. I wonder why? The man then of course blames the girl who served him, but logically finds no sympathy there. How did this person manage to live to adulthood?
- A staff member is called down to fix a faulty vending machine. He turns up to see a woman standing in front of the machine, which is £3.50 in credit. He asks her what's wrong - she tells him "I put money in, nothing happen." (or some other form of broken English. Spend enough time around tourists and you'll start talking like this, too). He explains to her the usual process for vending machines: put money in, select item, thing comes out (or vice versa, but possibly the concept of more than one way to do things is a bit hard for some people). At the second step (that's 'select item') the woman exclaims in discovery. Is that how these magical machines work? They don't read your mind? I don't just cross my fingers and hope it gives me the drink I want? Revelation! Again, how did this person manage to feed and clothe themselves every day, quite apart from making it out of their hotel and to the wax museum?
Confidence in the human race: lost.
