The randomness of trawling through archives...

Part of my job at the moment involves looking through the photographic collection at the National library. Most of the records that I skim past are relatively boring, such as 'Mobil, policemen in car' or 'Photographs of wrecked boats'.

But sometimes, the descriptions of photos are so completely strange, they make you laugh out loud. Luckily, part of my work can be done at home, so I managed to dodge the label of crazy-talks-to-herself-in-the-library-lady.

'Creator of collection unknown
Photographs taken by donor while insane'

Let's just mull this over for a second, shall we?

A collection of three photos. The record doesn't say what the photos are of. Or who took them. But the library knows that they were taken while the photographer was insane.

Brilliant.

Another photo that caught my eye, this time while actually looking through the (really badly organised) folders of photos, was a collection of 'erotic' novels seized by customs in 1990.

Retro porn. Awesome.

While some may think that writing erotic fiction is the pasttime of washed up authors or people who can't get a real job, the pen names some of these people chose reveals genius.

Examples:

- Donna Derriere
- Ina Haystack
- Tom Katt
- Stu Wart
- Dick Wiggins
- Rod Strong
- Justin Case
- U.R. Dumb
- John Boring
- Juan Tonn

Some of these are just standard sex puns. Donna Derriere. Dick Wiggins. Good for a snigger and then move on. Some are more questionable. Aren't you meant to not insult your readers? I wonder if U.R. Dumb sold many books. And also, is Juan Tonn meant to be a really bad play on 'Won Ton'?

Nonetheless, I bet the books by John Boring were real scorchers.

Bet you wish you could get your hands on some of these books.

7 Party ideas brought to you by ALAC

The wonderful folks at the Alcohol Advisory Council have put out a booklet this summer, detailing how to celebrate responsibly. Included are some fantastic ideas for party themes. I will assume that since the tone of the booklet is that you can party responsibly and have fun without getting drunk, these are meant to be fun themes to have instead of comsuming massive amoumts of alcohol at your party. I say, some of these would only make sense if you were *very* smashed.

1. Williams
2. Creepy
3. Quiet
4. Uni Student
5. (famous) lovers
6. Killer Whales
7. Isocoles triangles

I like the way the creators of this list thought we needed reminding that the 'lovers' had to be famous. Like otherwise people would just turn up in pairs acting all mushy? What kind of party theme would that be anyway?

The mind boggles. Also check out #6. A little bit specific for a theme, I think. It's not like you're leaving much room for the guests to get creative... But really, when I think of the theme 'killer whales', all I can think of is this.

Do you think these are fantastic, and can't wait to host a party of your own? Let's take a look at #7 again: Isocoles triangles. Not just triangles. But a specific type of triangle. You can just imagine the host of that party turning someone away at the door:

"No way man, those triangles are equilateral, you're OUTTA HERE!"
So I'm amped to host my next party now... but be warned, those triangles better be isocoles!